The sink in your bathroom collapses and cracks and you need to dispose of it.
In the past, you could have dumped it on the street or near the street-corner garbage bin.
Not any more. The fine regime of Chennai Corporation is on.
And I need your smart suggestion. How do I get rid of my broken sink?
I have nothing against fines. Fines on people who spit, relieve themselves, toss garbage around and litter public places.
My apartment is at a street corner, a rather busy junction though ours is an inner colony. When a family in our complex nursed a drum stick tree in the corner and shared the fruits with us we appreciated the effort of the old lady. And the sambhar tasted real good.
Much later I realised that the drooping foliage was a convenient cover for passers-by to indulge in jet streams on the compound wall.
You may accuse me of being a heartless man for chasing away these men who are midway through their jet-stream. But you would pardon me if your bedroom is close to a wall that is soaked in urine.
So yes, our civic body must fine such people.
But how do I get rid of my sink?
I thought of disposing of it when our watchman grabbed his forty winks at midnight. It didn't work.
I tried again when the power broke down at night. But a neighbour on the top floor suddenly flashed an emergency torch all around and almost embarrassed me.
I think I may have to turn to my lawyer now. He is the kind of person who does not read the small print in the rule book; rather, he is an expert at picking the loopholes between the lines.
Maybe the City Fathers didn't foresee eventualities like the disposal of broken sinks and faded car covers.
I still haven't seen Corporation Inspectors doing the rounds.
Will they be in khaki, deep blue or NIFT-designed uniforms?
I have told my maid to go by the rules - toss the garbage bag into the green bin of Neel Metal Fanalca and ensure it doesn't spill out.
Having made enemies of NMF, this may be the opportune time for 'lets-give-it-back-to- him' exchanges!